This Was Not In The Child Rearing Handbook

I'm going to apply for a gun permit.

So, I took The Princess and Ma Mere to the mall Sunday and more than once (9 times, I counted!) little pimple faced boys stopped to look at my Princess. I almost threw my DQ blizzard at one of them (Not really. I'm not gonna throw food that I could be eating at anyone!) What did The Princess do when she saw the boys look at her? Was she disgusted and revolted? No! She smiled!

I'm getting a gun. I will learn to use it. And I DARE the boys to keep looking.

I know, I know. They'll look anyway and she will look back. But when the hell did this happen? I don't remember reading about this in the handbook! Ok, so I didn't read the handbook - I didn't have time. I was raising a kid!

I wonder how much time you get for shooting a kid in the mall. What if I shoot them in the leg and simply maim them? Do I get the same amount of time? Is that considered premeditated? Geeze, I need to ask a lawyer about those questions.

...Then I'd probably better ask for representation.

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