3.02.2010

Tuesday Helpful Hints

I saw and heard about a few things today that really should not have happened. People, I don't want you to let these things happen again, ok?

--- I don't want you to get arrested in the middle of rush hour traffic with a red bandanna, blue sweatpants and 1 tennis shoe. I don't understand how you were driving with only 1 tennis shoe on. I wonder if that is part of the reason for the arrest.

--- I don't want you to change clothes while on the M@rt@ train. I know that the passengers pretend that it's ok, but they really are confused by this. But, if you are going to do this, I hope your bra and panties match. (thanks Tall girl for this one)

--- I'm not sure that you should be putting mascara on while driving. Yes, it's a stop light but ma'am, it's green and you are driving.

--- I'm not sending my child to you for tutoring if you misspell tutoring on your cardboard sign.

--- Don't name your kid Sad-e. I'm not opposed to the name, I am opposed to the spelling. (thanks Sister for this one)

--- Before attempting to lay blame at another person's feet, make sure that the person doesn't practice "ass coverage". It could result in YOU getting in waaaay more trouble than you originally were in (thanks to Emi No - but she doesn't know it yet)

--- Pick a color for your car. And, for the record, "primer" is not a color.

--- Going to the library isn't that hard. It's also not as painful as you make it out to be. But, ok, if you'd rather spend $25 on a book rather than read it for free because you don't have the "time" to order it on-line at 10am and then pick it up at the librarians desk at 5pm, you deserve to spend $25.

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