10.25.2010

What's In Your Casket?

I'm stealing borrowing a blog topic today. CG spoke a few weeks back on Tony Curtis and what he had placed in his casket when he died. I'm not big on the whole casket thing cause honestly, I want The Princess to have science people come pick up my body and in a year bring her back some ashes or something. When I go to the great Farmers Market in the sky, I don't want a funeral. No, no - don't send flowers. I can't smell them - you shoulda sent them while I was alive. Don't call to pay your respects - you shouldn't visited when I was alive. Ask me to lunch now, while I'm alive. I don't want singing or crying or anything but eating.

Yep, I want The Princess and anyone else that she decided to go to the Olive Garden and eat from the never-ending pasta bowl, soup and salad. Then I want her to go out for ice cream. AND, go watch Gone With The Wind (she can break it up into a weekend of activities if she wishes).

I don't want her spending thousands of dollars on a box that's gonna get dirty. I'd rather have future doctors look at parts of my body and go,

"Wow, those are some jacked up eyes! Good Lord how did she see?".

"Doesn't matter. Did you see her feet? They are really pretty!"

"Yeah but she couldn't see her feet. She didn't get to enjoy how pretty they were."

"That's okay. Every summer the world got to."

Yep, that's what the future doctors will say. And then they will giggle and listed to what the professor is saying.

BUT...if I did do caskets, I'd a good book with me. I don't know how long the wait is gonna be.
 

2 comments:

  1. That's a nice way to be remembered -- I wish there was a way to get an affordable funeral. I was surprised to learn that the casket goes into a concrete liner to prevent the earth from dipping and sagging. So you're paying for the casket *and* the liner. That's crazy.

    Also learned that there are a few casket options for cremation and that the options can accommodate an individual who is up to 275 lbs.

    But there's more. You can get a corrugated cardboard box for $125 unless the body weighs more than 275 lbs. Then your cardboard box costs $685.00.

    I learned all of that at the merchandise section of the Bartron-Myer Funeral Home website. This fine establishment is located in Montrose, PA. Man I love the internet.

    Yes I do.

    Wouldn't it suck to find out the person weighed 280 so you had to spend the extra $560.

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  2. That would totally suck! Why are "we" buried in a concrete box? Isn't it ashes to ashes - dust to dust? Aren't we suppose to disolve into a pile of ashes? That's why I'm going to help out some med students instead.

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